First Steps Out

So I have a job interview at Target on Saturday. You might not believe this, but Target is not my dream job (shocker, right?). I can't think of anything at Target that I would like to do for any length of time.

It is a paycheck, though, and around here, jobs are scarce.

I've decided to put aside foolish pride and do something to make my life better. It's not an ideal situation, but it might mean enough money to get out of this basement and get my life moving again. It might mean stretching student loan money that much further, and with the interest I'm going to pay on those, I need to stretch them as far as I can.

I think one of the reasons I'm still in the basement is that I never learned that sometimes you really have to do things you don't want to do. I wanted (hell, sometimes I still do want it) to own an internet business, selling information and other products that people can use and that make their lives better.

The problem is, no matter what the latest internet marketing guru tells you, without money to survive on, it really is impossible to make money in a business. If you're starving, it's hard to focus on selling a stupid ebook for someone else.

So that's the lesson of this post: Accept that there are things you will have to do that you really don't want to do, but accept them as a temporary solution. I have to believe that, while there will always be things I don't want to do, there will always be things that I DO want to do as well. Now, if I can just get doing more of those things, and less of the other stuff.

Because I've missed Blogging

I've spent a lot of time trying to learn about the internet. I started my first website when I was 13. It was a fan site for a video game I was really into at the time (I miss you Quest for Glory!).

Shortly after that, these things called blogs started getting popular. All my friends had one. Apparently it was cool to just post whatever you were thinking about a person, place, event, or what have you on the internet.

What? A public forum where people might read what I think about something? That sounded great!

And once again I was hooked. I love the internet. I love cats using bad spelling, I love poking people, I love videos of people doing stupid things, I even love those stupid forwards people send to your email.

But then I started getting sucked into the "making money" with the internet. My joy of the internet was overtaken by my joy of cashing in on it. I convinced myself after hours of reading ebooks and listening to audio training programs that I was now an internet expert! I was all powerful!

Then I took a step back and looked at my bank account (empty), I looked at my social life (nonexistent), and I looked at my mental state (not good).

The truth is I really didn't like who I was or what I was becoming. Mostly, I was little better than a broke shut-in. I hated that about myself, and I was on the road to truly hating everything about me.

So I decided to change. This blog is designed to help me relax and work into a new life. I don't really care if nobody ever reads it (but if I didn't want people to, I would probably just write it in a paper book). I'm going to show off my warts a little here. So, the truth hurts, but it's better to get it out in the open.

Currently, I live in my parents basement. I'm 27 years old and live in my parents basement. Yeah, it sucks. I've lived away from home several times, but I run out of money and wind up back here. I couldn't tell you why that keeps happening, except that this is a safe place where I'm comfortable. Ever hear the phrase "The enemy of the great is the good enough"? My parents place is my good enough.

Onward. I don't have my degree yet. I've jumped around to several different programs of study, never really committing to one. Because of this, the only jobs I qualify for don't pay enough to biggie size a meal at McDonalds. I've worked mostly in customer service, sales, and technical support. I've been a phone junky for a long time now. I've sworn off those jobs for as long as I can, and hopefully forever. My current job is a lot of fun. I teach an after school science program at some of the local charter schools in town. I'm really finding I love teaching, and I'm going after a degree that will let me teach science later on.

So broke, living in my parents basement, and it might amaze you to know that I'm single. I know, right? Shocker. I do date periodically, and have been lucky to date some extremely amazing women. Most of them were crazy, but what can you do about that? I'm starting to realize that I'm no catch either, at least not at the moment.

I have to believe that a person can change. Otherwise, what's the point? If I'm going to be stuck living like this for the rest of my life anyway, I'd rather spend the time trying to get out of it and fail than accept my fate and wonder if I might have done more.

So this is my mission: Get a life, get a degree, get another job, get a great girl, and get moving.